Mar 5, 2008

Eris is going to pwn the Solar System

Or so I hear.

Now, I didn’t know about this, which is rather surprising, since I spent some time lurking within the conspiracy genre of sites around the web. It could just be because my natural inclination is towards more political theories, or it could just be that I dont take any theories really seriously, and never paid enough attention to notice this at all.

But anyway, it seems that the recent discovery of the Planet Eris has been latched onto by conspiracy theorists as being the planet Nibiru. For those of you not up on your fringe theories (and shame on you indeed) Nibiru is supposedly a giant tenth planet that has a long elliptical orbit that takes it in and out of the solar system in a manner reminiscent of Pluto, only far more severe. Severe enough, in fact, that it somehow managed to to smash into another hypothetical planet between Mars and Jupiter, where the present day asteroid belt is. This second planet is called Tiamat, naturally after the Dragon, whereas Nibiru is assosciated with Marduk, in Sumerian mythology.

Now, part of the planet Tiamat that broke off eventually became our own dear home planet, while Nibiru continued on its merry way through the solar system. However, there is more. Nibiru is supposedly the home of an advanced race of alien beings known in the Bible as the Nephilim…or to scholars of conspiracy theory and alternative Sumerian history, the Anunnaki, made famous as the reptilian shapeshifters of the theories of David Icke (among others).

Nibiru should, allegedly, be swinging back through on another pass of this part of the solar system around…oh, 11.11 UT, December 21st, 2012. I never saw that one coming. Anyhow, when it does swing around, we should expect all sorts of crazy seismic activity and, if we’re lucky, a pole shift.

As can be seen from this particular blog entry, Eris is now considered within some conspiracy circles as being the same as Nibiru:

The real cause of climate changes, volcanoes activity, intensification of the seismic activity etc., is the planet Eris’s getting closer to our solar system, intermediary named 2003-UB-313 and known in Antiquity under various names as: Nibiru, Marduk, Nemesis, Hercolubus, The Gods Planet, the Planet of the Empire, the Planet of the Cross, the Red Planet.


So there you have it, people. Eris is going to pwn this planet good. Quite what role the reptilian shapeshifters play in this space drama remains uncertain, but I’m sure we will hear about it sooner or later.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hope they're right... the LULZ would be worth their weight in gold.

-Ratatosk

Cain said...

Boy would I look stupid the day after that....by the way, you should be able to use OpenID now to make comments...basically meaning you can use your LJ to comment here.

Telarus, KSC said...

I totally agree with Tosk, there.

Erin Palette said...

What's interesting is that according to the Mayan calendar, the world is supposed to end on December 23, 2012.

I put more stock in the Mayan date myself, because it has not one but TWO Laws of Five (2+3=5, 2+0+1+2=5.

Fnord.